During Thursday’s episode of TikTok star Alix Earle’s show on YouTube, “Hot Mess with Alix Earle,” she broke down in tears while recalling the eating disorder she had in school, which she did not discover she was struggling with until during her college days.
‘Toxic’ high school
Earle – who is hailed as TikTok’s “It Girl” and “hot best friend” from the popularity of her videos – shared how she suffered from an eating disorder in high school triggered by the “toxic” environment she found herself in during that time.
She said she never encountered a problem with food before her high school, until she saw her classmates in her sophomore year paying thousands of dollars for “extreme diets.” Call it peer pressure.
“In my mind, I knew that this wasn’t normal at first, but after watching their habits and watching them lose weight and watching them be so satisfied over this, it became more normalized for me,” Earle, who graduated from Red Bank Catholic High School in New Jersey, said.
Small salad without dressing
She then started to adopt what her high school classmates were doing. From eating the usual balanced lunches, she transitioned to eating food like a small salad without dressing. She also became obsessed with counting her calorie intake.
The TikToker added how she would get stressed out if her calorie count would get too high, so she would buy juice cleanses to fix things.
“I just went down such a bad path with myself, with my body, with my image, and I started to have this sort of body [dysmorphia. I would] look in the mirror and I would see someone way bigger than the person that I was,” she shared further.
But that was not everything about her disorder. She said her eating disorder worsened when she would arrive home from school hungry, so she would binge eat then purge once again since she felt “guilty” for consuming “too much” food.
Her mom intervenes
When Earle’s mom already started to intervene, asking her about what was going on, that was the first moment she realized she had to stop.
It took her until during her college years when she recovered from the illness. There, she met friends who helped her realize her eating habits were unhealthy.